Vegetarian Omelet

Looking at the breakfast menu, I am feeling terribly repelled. The list includes -ham omelets, beef omelets, ham and beef sandwich, bacon and beef omelets. It seems , almost all the permutations of beef, bacon and ham are mentioned spoiling the merrit of eggs which I always thought was the main omlete- ingredient.

I was born vegetarian. I remained vegetarian until I was 4. My Brahmin parents, having produced offspring while living in West Bengal, had tough challenge at hand - of bringing up the child ensuring he doesn’t taste fish. An exam, which they failed the moment I consumed my first Catla fish at our house owner’s place.

Of course I received my share of punishment but that didn’t stop me. I graduated to better levels of goat and chicken to start with, followed by more exotic ones like Reindeer in Finland to oysters in Manila (I was told it does wonders to your carnal skills!) to shark in Jakarta.

I ‘eye’ one of the smiling waitresses and she comes to me. Interestingly this way of communication remains the same, notwithstanding the type of place you are in - beer bar or breakfast table.
Thinking about a suitable word, I simply ask

‘Do you have ‘basic’ omelet’

‘Basic?’ you mean bacon omelet?’

‘No, the one that is sans bacon/beef/ham’

‘For a while sir ‘

Which is a filipino substitute for ‘I’ll be right back’

In India, Non vegetarianism means chicken tikka masala , tandoori chicken and mutton rogan josh. Fish and crab find their way here and there and period.

The quest to find Chicken -oriented food while traveling abroad, is a difficult job since eating non vegetarian outside India also means ham , beef and bacon. A reason why l love uncle colonel Sanders more than either of my two biologically related ones. Thanks to him and his KFC franchises , we are blessed with guaranteed supply for chicken worldwide.

She comes back in some time and replies ‘You mean the vegetarian omlete?’

Now the ‘Vegetarian omlet’ is new word to me. I am not sure if I am astound, intrigued or simply baffled. Confused, if its like plain dosa or chila , I ask for explanation

‘Does it have eggs?’

‘Of course sir’! She smiles..perhaps naturally for the first time

I agree to the prospect of eating the vegetarian omelet.

I notice , my new omelet avatar is taking more time than others. I began to read newspaper , trying to cultivate a quasi genuine interest in exploits of some local pugilist hero Manny Pacquiao, while seeing others happily finish their breakfast.

Finally my vegetarian omelet arrives . The waitress puts it on the table and goes back to bring the pepper, flashing another of her prescribed illuminated smile.

The vegetarian omelet looks very thick & rich. It seems at least 6 eggs have been squandered preparing it. I cut a piece of it and realize I have opened the Pandora box as different types of vegetables pop out from that opening!

Tomatoes, broccoli, a look alike of capsicum and lot of other bizzare things which I ‘ll now name as unidentified food objects (UFOs)

I look around and notice these UFOs have landed on every other plate, which, actually simplifies my calculation of the recipie -replace bacon by baigan and switch to vegetarian omlete!!

Note : This is a migrated post from